My Son’s Bromance

The news this morning carried a short about bromance  and it’s positive effect on men’s health and relieving stress.  I was reminded of the wonderful bromance in our family.

When BJ was about to start Junior High,  we moved to Madison, WI.  After a year of searching, we finally found a small Presbyterian church, where we were both comfortable.  It was in the Confirmation program for young teens,  that BJ met A.M. (AM)

My son collected the small and large GI Joe figures.  He rarely went anywhere without a couple 3.5 inch GI Joes in his pocket.  While he was waiting for me after church one day, he was messing with a couple GI joes.   A.M. spotted this kid with the GI Joes.  As it turned out,  AM also collected GI Joes and thus began the bromance!

There were lots of trips back and forth to each other’s home,  setting up their GI Joes, rejoicing when the other acquired a new one, etc.  It seemed like they would do something together every weekend.  They would haul their tubs of figures and equipment back and forth.

I sometimes wondered if AM had too much influence on BJ.  One time I remember grounding BJ.   AM was giving him ideas over the phone, of what to say to me and then BJ would repeat that to me.   I was livid.  I went right over to AM’s house and of course he sent his sister to the door first.  When he finally came to the door, in my calmly controlled anger, I told him to stop telling  BJ what to do and not undermine me.  The problem was resolved.

My son had trouble remembering the when and where’s of activities.  He might know part of the information but never have the whole of it.  i suppose it was because of ADD or the medication he took.    He never knew when basketball or soccer practice was. He didn’t know the times of the dance,  when Senior pictures were due, etc.   He would call AM to find out.

They would chatter away on the phone and I would smile to myself, hearing the banter, laughing and teasing that went on.  I was thankful that BJ found a close friend that he could count on.   Even though there were girls and other friends throughout high school,  it was amazing that they remained close until they graduated.  Looking back,  I think my son’s teen years were much happier because of this bromance.

BJ went into the military soon after high school graduation.   He and AM would talk daily whenever BJ was in the states.  When overseas,  AM would put together care packages for BJ and his buddies.  BJ’s girlfriend and later his wife,  was the first to suggest the term “bromance” to me.  It was likely an adjustment for her to acknowledge the close friendship the two guys had.

Both friends were in each other’s wedding.  When each friend  has gone thru difficult times,  the other remains loyal and supportive.

After 20 years,  they remain in contact and keep up with what’s happening in their lives.  I don’t think I have ever told AM that I love him. He has enriched my son’s life and I will be forever grateful to him.  Our family was blessed and continues to be blessed by his friendship and thoughtfulness.

Since BJ was an only child,  AM has been like a brother.  This bromance has been a wonderful addition to our family.

A close friendship is downright personal.   ©  2016


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