Ever since my partner and I have moved to a new state and city, we have been aware of the need to find new friends. Approaching our second year of new residence, we have become more intentional about attending events where we might make some gay or lesbian friends.
We found a church we like, so we started attending more regularly. We belong to a couple of email groups and attended a few social gatherings. What have we discovered thus far?
The couples that we have had the opportunity to visit with, don’t visit back! We ask them non threatening questions, allow for a lull in the conversation, give them a chance to ask us something, and zippo! Zero! After one and two hours of not being asked a single question, we are a bit stunned. Nobody seems interested in us.
So we took an inventory:
1. Did we make eye contact? Yes.
2. Did we ask about their interests, family, jobs, how they met? Yes.
3. Were we courteous? Yes.
4, Were we kind? Yes.
5. Did we smile? Yes
6. Toothless grin? No
7. Did we chatter nonstop? No.
8. Ask about money? No.
9. Ask about religion or politics? No.
10. Discuss Sex? No.
Obviously, we are still looking for friends. We have some more possibilities at the church we are attending, but if all else fails, there’s always straight people. I was just hoping at some point in my life, to have a few interesting lesbian friends. Wish us luck!